I’ve now been in Dublin for roughly 72 hours. The easygoing energy of touring a new place has vanished and I feel left with overwhelming sensations of nerves and excitement. I wander the city, without any true indication of where I am, but with the confidence that I can navigate the unknown.
I took a leap of faith when I stepped off the plane without much of a plan, but with a holiday working visa in hand. Breathing deeply, I walked down the tunnel to the terminal, through the airport and answered the questions from the immigration officer. For the first time, the stamp on my passport was not for entering the country for a few days, rather it consumed the whole page. I need to register with the immigration authority to stay in the country longer than 90 days or else..
Though on the plane there was the most adorable little girl with wild brown hair, a toothy grin and magenta pants who exuded joy. When I first saw her she gave me the largest smile, and kept turning around in her seat to say hello to the sweet Irish lady sitting behind her. Then, her attention turned to me. Somehow we had this unspoken connection where she would rest her head on her hands and smile. I would do the same back, with subtle movements of the head and face. How simple and sweet it was, to enjoy a subtle unspoken connection.
Meanwhile once at my hostel, Social interactions with my fellow travelers are different than what I experienced in the past. Everyone is in such a transient place while here. Some are open to conversation and connections, while others remain in their own world. Though I still find it easy to become friends and discuss a myriad of topics.
I’ve met a wide variety of characters hailing from a wide variety of lands. Brazil, Canada, France, Belgium, Chile, Catalonia, Croatia. All coming from unique experiences. All experiencing unique situations and things. They have taught me things in both obvious and subtle ways, and I continue to examine a glimpse into another worldly life. Each a unique character, teaching in ways they are probably not even conscious of. Whether it is an underlying overt confidence that evokes a laughter born out of discomfort, or a humble sense of intelligence, I am learning.
But nothing compares to what I am learning about myself. I’m coming to terms with the understanding that the decisions I make are for me. I always knew that was true, but there are many times that I would choose to do certain things on other’s behalf, and not for what made the most sense for me to do. I am learning some limitations I have, and some strengths.
I am still so unsure of the future, and it took three days, but I feel so much more confident in my decisons and my plans for at least the next 3 weeks. Assuming I can find accommodation that isn’t a hostel, and am confirmed to find work, things should begin to fall into place (I hope).
